Wonderful Travel Memories

Travelling - one of the common interests that holds us together. You like to travel and click places. I like to travel and release stress. 
The first time we traveled together, you made me think I did not know how to travel. Carrying 5 big bags for 3 day travel seemed like relocation to you. From our travel fights to planning our next travel together, you converted me from a tourist to a traveler. You changed my views about travelling. You opened me to new avenues for travelling. You taught me so many new things about travelling. My idea and intention about travelling changed. 
We enjoyed our domestic travels which then expanded to national and then international travels. You explored the different cuisines and made me try new varieties. From five star hotels to bag packers room, we have seen it all. From flying in flights to sailing in ships we have been together. We trekked together, we snorkeled together- we got over each others fears. I slowly got rid of my fear of heights and you became confident with snorkeling. The best experience I still remember about snorkeling was the happiness on your face when you dived in the middle of Maya Bay with the colorful fishes. 
From shopping in Bangkok to fashion street in Mumbai, you came to know about what it means to shop. Accompanying me to never ending street side shopping in Jaipur to the huge malls in Singapore, you know what it means to shop with a girl now. Shopping - something that has now thought you to think of your loved ones and get something for them during your travels. It creates memories.
Photography one of your big passions in life. How you utilize all your time during travel and yet click so wonderful pics is something I still need to learn from you. The patience you have to perfect a shot till it happens, to taking multiple shots waiting for the right moment - that is the crazy amount of passion you have for your camera. From our first trip to Goa to our recent trip to Trichy, one thing is constant and that is your camera bag and the passion to explore new places in your area. Your enthusiasm for exploring new avenues, your passion to mystery, your company for all these wonderful travels - is all I ask to keep up with and never lose the charm. Thank you my supportive hubby for always being the best traveler I could ask for !

My scrapbook entry is below - https://memories.hdfclife.com/message/IkYCeH1OqZGqd5oxS8Y0DA== 

Memorable Trek

Few months back while having dinner with my husband, I was telling him,"I am fed up. I need a change.The monotony of this life is killing me.Let us go for a vacation".To which he hit upon an idea. He said,"How about going for a winter trek to Kedarkantha in Uttarakhand". While i did not get convinced with his idea, i decided to give it a try.

We booked our tickets and started with the preparations required to go for the trek. With our backpacks on in end of December, we reached Dehradun. From there we got into a bus Sankhri.  On reaching there, we stayed at Hotel Swargrohini Palace for the night before the trek.What a view from our room. We could already see mountain peaks covered with snow ahead of us. As night approached, we had to pile on layers to save ourselves from being frozen.

The next day morning, we all were given a briefing and introduced to our trek guide. With that we started the trek climbing one step at a time.  2 Hours went by and by now it was starting to get exhausting. We hit the snow patches soon, stopped to rest for 15-20 minutes and then continued with our trek. From there, we could see snow everywhere. The trek was getting more and more challenging with every step. Finally after 9 hours,at around 2 pm we reached Juda ka Talab camp site.The pond was covered by a thick frosty layer.We rested around the lake in the sun and had our lunch.

As it got colder in the evening we lit a bonfire .We had our dinner and we retired to the tents into our sleeping bags after a tiring day. 

At around 2 am we were awakened by our guide. He asked us to pack our bags and start climbing right away for the basecamp and we had to reach the summit before sunrise. It was pitch dark everywhere. So with flash lights on and trekking poles, we started climbing once again. Badly chilly winds, ear pains, reducing atmospheric pressure, reducing oxygen, tiredness from last day, we kept climbing. After about 2 hours of walking in deep snow and we reached the base camp.The view from the base camp was panoramic. We were all excited for the final push to the summit. As much as exciting and adventurous the journey was, it was very challenging both mentally and physically. I and my husband had to stop several times and motivate and push each other to finish the trek. We took a lot of pictures along the way. After 5 hours we finally stood atop conquering Mount Kedarkanta. It was surrounded by mountain peaks covered in snow. 

What a memorable feeling it was. For last 2 days, we were totally out of mobile coverage and no other distractions. I and my husband were together in this journey and our only goal was to have the strength to push through and finish the trek. I learnt many things from this trek like never to give up on the challenges that life throws but to keep pushing through them. In the journey of life we get distracted by so many things and we often quit. But if we keep pushing and focus on our goal we will be successful. 

My scrapbook for this entry is 

End the trend and share the load

Few weeks back I was invited to Anirudh's place for lunch on Sankranti. This is an important festival for them and since we were dating for a long time, his family had unofficially considered me part of their family. Every time I go to his house, I observe something weird. Now please do not get me wrong. Anirudh is a very nice guy. He has been very supportive and caring of me and my life choices. But his family has a very narrow minded views towards several things. Even in this generation, they observed gender inequality and some work were reserved to be done by guys and some work has to be done by the women of the house.

Now I have been brought in a very different way. I have always been taught to question things which do not convince me. But in their house if I begin questioning about blind beliefs and the purpose behind doing it, it is considered rude. It is considered arrogant. My parents had given me enough freedom and independence. But here his parents had too many restrictions on the dress, on timings, on topics to speak and the list goes on.

My parents had warned me before about his family. I really felt that our relationship was very strong than these petty things. But on the day of Sankranti what I observed really irritated me. They started seeing alliances for his elder brother Avinash. And what sort of a girl were they expecting - Post graduate, expert in cooking, skilled in taking care of house, ready to stay at home after wedding. Seriously why would someone want to stay at home after doing a post graduation. I began questioning them about their expectations. But they asked me remain silent. 

In their family, the sole purpose of the women of the house is to give birth to baby, be a housewife and take care of the house. Their mom has the done the same things and they expect their daughter-in-laws to also do the same thing. Does this make any sense in today's generation? I ask his mother and she asks me to follow the rules 

Though I shut my mouth, I could not shut my thoughts. When Avinash can be a graduate and work, why couldn't his wife do that? Why do they want a highly educated girl to waste her education by sitting at home after wedding? What exactly do you mean by skilled in taking care of house? Is this not your house too? Why cannot you make some contributions anywhere? Women are at par with men everywhere these days. Still you follow the trends of the 19th century and follow gender prejudices. What sort of an example are you setting for your family? What will your kids learn from you if you follow these illogical trends. If we women need our son and future daughter-in-law to thank us then teach the men to end the trend and share their load to embrace household duties however boring or uninteresting they are. 

I am joining the Ariel #ShareTheLoad campaign at BlogAdda and blogging about the prejudice related to household chores being passed on to the next generation.

Learn to help ourselves

It was after 2 years that I went to my sisters place. Her son Karthik is now in 7th class and the last time I saw him he was a small kid. I was really excited to see my sister after so many years and was looking forward to meet her. 

The day arrived and I started to her place. The moment I reached her house, I was in a shock.  The whole house seemed in a mess. She opened the door with a smiling face but I could see the tiredness and exhaustion. As I came in and was talking to her, Karthik came to the room from inside. He was very reluctant to talk to me since he had not seen over many years. However he was ordering his mom to get his shirt for school ready. I was surprised my sister silently obeyed his orders. Then I saw his throw his old dress into the pile of laundry and rush out of the house. All this while my sister hardly spoke a word. 

I could not keep silent any longer. It was hardly an hour I came to her house and could see something wrong going on. When I spoke to her she mentioned that he was a kid and does not like to keep things clean. But the problem was she never taught him the right ways. Assuming that kid is small and will understand as he grows up is totally wrong. How will he understand when he has grown up seeing that. I asked my sister to slowly teach him to wash clothes or at-least put the clothes into the washing machine while she could attend other chores.However she herself did not want him to do that.

"Let him focus on studies. I do not want him to get involved in these things", were her words. By showering a lot of love on our children, we are closing their eyes from reality. Karthik has always seen his mom doing the dirty laundry and other household work. Has there been a single day his dad has done that? Never. How will he learn about equality and sharing the load if this is the example he has seen. 

My sister has to let go of the fact that he is a small kid. Class 7 kids are no more small. They are much smarter than us these days. He needs to be taught to respect others and see all genders equally. If this is the example in my own house, I am sure this is the case in many households.

So I urge all the ladies to let go of perfection and lets not blindly shower love. Lets learn to help ourselves to better our future self !

I am joining the Ariel #ShareTheLoad campaign at BlogAdda and blogging about the prejudice related to household chores being passed on to the next generation.

Promises do stay true !

One of the things I always wanted in my man was to respect his partner equally and value them. So the day Anirudh proposed me, I wanted to see if this guy really matches this criteria. I had always known him as my friend but never seen this aspect. I borrowed time from him for my decision and started to closely monitor him. I even went one step ahead and tried to put scenarios where I wanted his views.

So far it was going good. He was one of my very good friends in Hyderabad. No one knew me more than him. Our mindsets matched and we really enjoyed each others company. But when it comes to taking friendship to next level, we need to consider so many things.So after a good one months time, I called him for a lunch date on Sunday.

As usual he came on his bike and we met at our favorite eating joint. Deep inside i too liked this guy but always held back after my first experience with Manoj. So I decided to pour it out to Anirudh. It went very uncomfortable at the start. But I wanted Anirudh to know how hurt and depressed I was from my relationship with Manoj because of one thing missing. Manoj never valued me. He forever seemed to dismiss my ideas, my suggestions were rubbish. Girls were only decorative pieces in life. I should become a housewife and quit my job. I do not have the right to dream and many more crap. Time and again I felt hurt and my self esteem dropped and he never took a second to recognize that. All my efforts to tell him ended with fights and he would convince me up and again the cycle repeats.I was really tired of being just a girl in his life. He was very egoistic like his father. I had my nights crying about this relationship. I had several hours questioning my own thoughts. What kind of a relationship was I in where I was not valued. If this is the case now what will happen once I follow his words and quit my job. I was not meant for that. This never fit with me because I was not that girl. So on 17th Jan I gathered all my courage and called off my relationship with Manoj. 

I wanted Anirudh to know the main things that mattered to me. He was the caring, supportive, sweet, lovable, understanding friend but he always had to know what I expect in my partner. I wanted Anirudh to value my dreams as I respected his choices. I wanted Anirudh to respect my ideas and suggestions as I always considered his opinions. 

After opening up my heart to him, the first thing he said was "I love you for the person you are. I can never dream to hurt you. I need you in my life. Your happiness and satisfaction is my top priority. I promise from the bottom of my hurt to love your every single day. I promise to be with you forever!".

Those words of Anirudh at our favourite eating joint still hold true and I am proud he stood by his promises.

“I’m blogging about the kasams I want from my man this Women’s Day with the #SadaSexy activity at BlogAdda